Finding a reason to smile has been pretty hard for me this week.
I've been feeling sad, lonely, discouraged, and like I'm a burden on my husband.
I live in a city I hate, and the fact that my only friends are Jared and Harry, only makes it worse.
I love searching for vintage treasures, and Bakersfield is full of them, but shopping can't be my only source of happiness. That's just sad! Making accessories and clothes makes me happy, but business has been slow lately, and I feel discouraged. I love what I make, and I want other people to love it too! I guess I take it personally when things are slow. It hurts my feelings. I know it's silly, but I can't help it.
Rose Red is my only job, besides school, and I feel bad that Jared has to support me. I worked full time while he was in law school, and I was the one with all the money. It didn't bother me that I was the only one with a paying job, I actually liked being the provider. Being the dependent is hard for me, I can't help feeling like a freeloader.
OK, I just had to get that off my chest! Thanks for letting me complain.
Now it's time to count my blessings, and have a positive attitude. I was on a mission this morning to find things that make me smile. I wanted to share some of the pictures that helped put a smile on my face.
The last one is my favorite!
What has made you smile today?
8 comments make me happy!:
i totally know what you mean by feeling like a freeloader. i work full time but ben makes so much more than i do, i feel like i am not contributing as much as i'd like.
i hope you are feeling better. looking on the bright side is always a good start.
You are not a freeloader! I don't know what I would do without you. I think you're the best and super talented and I know your business is going to take off.
darling girl. you inspire me on a daily basis. this funk is temporary. the universe seems to be a little discombobulated as of late, so that means we are too. i wish you nothing but smiles and if it makes you feel better, i smiled after seeing those pics.
and ps - if i lived in bakersfield, i'd be your friend.
Sending thoughts of big hugs your way, my dear. Some days are dreary. I'm wishing you some sunshine (of the not too hot fall sort ;)
I know what you mean! I have been job searching for a couple months since I've graduated from college and I'm living at home for the moment and it just feels awful. My friends from college have moved back to their hometowns and my friends from my high school are rarely in town either, so I know how that can be hard! I know that I don't know you too well, but feel free to send me an email if you ever want to talk!
Your work on your shop is always absolutely beautiful! Keep up the hard work and I'm sure it will pay off eventually!
I'd be your friend in Bakersfield too :)
For a while I was supporting Thomas and I promise that he didn't feel like burden, its what you do for the person you love if they need you and I'm sure you would do the same for Jared if the sitation was reversed.
I love that last picture too :)
Don't worry about being seen as a freeloader, you're married! I don't think a spouse can ever be a burden just because they're not making as much money, I mean it's your wife/husband...you're a partnership now, not just a roomate who needs to pay their share of the rent. Fear not! He loves you and will support you, he's your husband :)
Hey Rose Red, you don't know me but I just stumbled across your Etsy shop and blog. Don't be depressed pretty lady! You are gorgeous and very talented and your work inspires me. Your husband is lucky to have married you! I am sorry you're feeling lonely. Just know that there are people out here who appreciate your art. :)
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